What is self-regulation?
Beginning from infancy, instilling limits and a sense of responsibility will
give your children a sense of being valued and supported as they grow up. They
look to you for boundaries.
Frustration plays a big
role in children’s behavior. An inability to express negative emotions can lead
to aggressive outbursts and tantrums. It’s important to teach preschoolers how
to increase their frustration tolerance. Give them choices, have your kids
stick to decisions previously made through gentle reminders and let them work
through any frustration that may arise. You can give your children a sense of
power through choices and decisions. If they feel like they are part of the
decision-making process, there is less room for resentment and subsequent
negative behavior.
Lead by example. If you
are able to deal with your own frustrations, you can demonstrate to your
children that problems can be solved through compromise and self-restraint. If
your children observe you being frazzled and powerless, it will bleed through
into your relationship with them. You can always explain to them that while you
are feeling frustrated it is okay to feel that way but still stick to your
resolutions.
Even when you enable
your children to deal with their own emotions, preschoolers may still become
overwhelmed with frustration, especially when in the company of other children.
Sometimes it becomes necessary to step in to avoid further escalation, even if
you are encouraging your kids to face their own challenges. When this happens,
it’s best to give them a chance to calm down and then talk about a particularly
frustrating situation. You can defuse critical situations easily by separating
kids that are fighting and shouting, then help them sort out the details when
the immediate problem is resolved.
